and so it begins

deployment is coming up soon...and I can't wrap my head around it. This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done. I've gone 3-4 months without him...but now a whole year :(

I'm going to be alone in a foreign country....
what makes it worse is I'm off-post, around Germans. Non-english speaking people.

I've met other wifes that are cool and I think I could make good friendships with but its still scary.

I never thought I'd miss home this much. When I couldn't get over here I was pissed off and wanted to be here more than anything. Then when I finally arrive, and begin my life here...I'm miserable.
Germany is just not the place for me. I much rather be in the states.


There are more and more girls finding out their pregnant...and it's making me sick. :(
I've cried time after time and I'm tired of crying. So whatever, good luck to you lucky bitches. Hope you realize [ones that are young, your life is over :)]

ugh, one girl I know gets blessed with a baby and all she wants to do is party. I'm like, why didn't you wear a FUCKING condom you dumb bitch if you didn't want kids. My god, it pisses me off soooo bad that dumb cunts get blessed with children, why millions of wonderful, loving couples loose theirs or can't have any!!!

i'm so mad right now....

blech!
I just have a million things running through my head...our future after deployment. What's gonna happen when we leave here, money-issues, kids, everything I could think of is in there.